Notes from Tommie

posted by tommie on May 28

I would like to go ahead and start off by saying that this isn’t rated PG-13 and should be read as such. For a long time now, even during highschool, I have been told that I am decent in writing and I quote “trashy little romance novels.” Just had the thought that I’d post a snippet to kind of see what others thought about my work. This is just a rough draft but I figured that it would be as fine an example as anything else:

As he lay there atop her cool body he knew that this would change things between them. Little more than her presence had made his body hard and rigid, a sharp contrast to her smooth skin and silken hair. Her aroma was intoxicating and only proved successful in arousing him further, though he was already well past and point he’d known in desire. She soothed his burning with an icy touch and fought back the darkness with a bright smile. All that he was longed to become one with her. To join their bodies together. He could feel a slight tremble as he pressed himself into her warmth; though it took all his might to not give into instinct and slow down to not hurt her. He wanted everything to be right and knew that he couldn’t risk her thoughts being some image he had put there, even if it was possible.

At first she hadn’t been sure of her feelings but his hot touch against her skin had awakened some inner desire: she would fulfill this hunger as well as the burning passion she could feel from his hardness. Even as he had thrust against her she had been overwhelmed by his mouth and hands following their own agendas. Static passed through her senses as his wet lips found peace with her swollen breasts and he pulled her against him by the small of her back. With each passing moment she could feel the predator that resided within him rise. That primal instinct that had separated him from others.

It felt as though if he had been the burning darkness she was the only light that could quench the flames: fulfill his inner desire. As protective as he had always been this was more for himself then she. Only in her presence had he ever felt so alive for something other then the hunt. Though that was the case he had held back his demons enough to feel her own passion rising as every thrust was matched by her own strength. A thin layer of sweat had begun to form highlighting even more how much he had grown since the last they met, every cut muscle giving a slight ripple in the light.

The more time that they spent together the more she could feel it herself: this wasn’t just him, these were her own wants and needs as well. Their breath, hearts, their very souls had been intertwined and began to merge as one. Neither of them could recognize where one of them ended and the other began. Even if it was just temporary they had been joined as one, neither one wanting to let go of the moment after being apart for so long…

Any comments would be greatly appreciated. Good, bad, or indifferent I like to get comments from those that are interested in my writing. Unfortunately it was stuff like this that kept me awake during Mr. Furlow’s class in highschool. Who knows, maybe if some like it I’ll post some more…

As always hoping for a better tomorrow though we all must face the darkness, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 27

Before I get to far into this post I would like to go ahead and warn you that you may or may not agree with me in my beliefs on given topic; however, I humbly ask that you not attack my opinions. A peaceful, and civil, debate I’m open to but flat out attacks just provoke. The topic at hand is homosexuality and I would like to start off with ten interesting points provided by Psychology Today:

“1. [10 to 12 percent of men are gay.] False, 2 to 6 percent of men are gay.
2. Gay men have longer, thicker penises than straight men, on  average.
3. As children, most gay men display gender-bending behavior, like dressing up in their sisters’ clothing or playing with dolls.
4. In general, gay men are worse then straight men at certain cognitive skills, like reading maps, spatial orientation, finding missing objects, and packing trunks.
5. Lesbians are better than straight women at certain spatial, navigational, and language tasks.
6. [Men with the most masculine voices tend to be straight.] The voices rates as most masculine are those of gay men (and the most feminine are those of lesbians).
7. [Gay men have distant fathers, suggesting that levels of childhood affection have an effect on on sexual orientation.] False, though some fathers may become distant in reaction to childhood gender nonconformity of boys who are born gay.
8. The more older brothers you have, the more likely you are to be gay.
9. [Sexual orientation correlates with whether you are right- or left-handed.] True, Homosexuals are 39 percent more likely to be left-handed or ambidextrous.
10. The ratio of the lengths of the second to fourth fingers predicts sexual orientation.”

In case you hadn’t realized, or haven’t been keeping up, my personal opinion on homosexuality is that we should accept it in our society and support the gay communities rights as human beings. Even if you don’t support that select lifestyle you shouldn’t try and attack their ability to try and be happy. As Americans we are all entitled to that ‘pursuit of happiness’ and for us to downplay a group of our citizens based on their sexuality is, to me, that same as race or religion. We didn’t support nazism and we shouldn’t support a political attack on the gay community.

All too often I have heard, comming from the highschool debate forum as well as my military background thus far, people attack the gay community for this or that. I think that the single most argument that honest to God pisses me off the most though is that two homosexuals are incapable of properly raising a child or becoming married. I understand a moderate amount of both the religious and political views on the subject and that only pisses me off all the more.

To the general religious world: “It’s against His will,” or “God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve.” While that may be  true He also made all the animals to serve us and to live in and be a part of our natural existance. The ‘natural argument’ stands no place for me as humans aren’t the only creatures to exhibit homosexual tendancies. His will is His alone and no mortal can convince me that they truly know His plan.

If you disagree with the lifestyle or have a friend ‘in need’ then pray about it and let God speak to the one in question. For He has said (off memory here so don’t actually have the verse number) “judge not lest ye be judged, and should you judge your brother then by that same standard shall you be judged” As humans we have all, and I don’t care WHO you are (not does the bible as we are brought into this very world with sin of the flesh already upon us), commited sexual sins at one point or another (of the actual flesh or of the mind, which is just as bad if not worse according to the bible) So do ME a favor and don’t judge another and ignore your own sins. To me, get right with God and ask for His help with your friends don’t take it into your own hands because I myself am not worthy of judging another.

From a political standpoint people argue that as they’re not actually able to reproduce they aren’t entitled to the legal side of marriage or that ‘it just doesn’t make sense for you two to be joined.’ Marriage is both good and bad by political standards and I believe that if two should want to be joined then who are we to deny that. As much as people rant and rave marriage did NOT start as a religious item, rather a LEGAL union between two people for property or some other item of value (usually attached to a dowry [however you spell that] of some kind usually on the maternal side).

In the end your views are going to be yours and there’s nothing that will change my opinion (they tried in junior/high school, basic training, and a.i.t.) But I maintain this, should you judge another for their sexuality then consider yourself before placing that judgement if you disagree with homosexuality. To me it always has been and always will be an individual basis, because I refuse to believe in a God that would not give all the same board and dice to play with like a game of D&D. Though the guidelines may be similar each characters particular rules depend on how they’re put together. What’s right for one may not be right for all.

Although I’m sure I’ll talk about this again that’s all I’ve got for now so I’ll talk to you all later if you are actually keeping up with my posts. More then lack of thoughts I have lack of time and need to wash up and get some sleep. The main reason I went ahead and posted this is the actual headline that caught my eye on the magazine was “Dare To Be Yourself,” it wasn’t untill I started reading it that I realized there was an article on homosexuality.

Reminding us all to love those around us and accept even if we don’t support, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 25

Todays post is more of an update then anything else as far as opinions or religion. I finished my first pt test just recently since completion of A.I.T. and scored a 230 our of a possible 300 (the Army standard being 180), my goal of a 260 for this test was not met. I ended up with 51 pushups, 58 situps (both pushups and situps timed for 2 minutes), and between 13:30-13:40 2 mile (about a minute slower then my normal time). While my situps did improve both my pushups and run were low enough to actually drop my normal score of 245-250.

What this means is simple, I need to spend more time working out or find a better routine (both my sqd leader and myself have already agreed on how to adjust our work out routine) As a result I may or may not be able to keep up with one post a day and might have to resort to posting once every other day depending on time and exhaustion. There is only so much you can fit into a busy day without pushing too far, and I don’t want all this time and effort to be counter-productive to achieving my goals while deployed.

To all my friends and family I miss you dearly and truly wish you well. You really shouldn’t worry too much about me. (Statistically speaking, I’m actually safer over here then back in the states. Doesn’t that make a whole lot of sense? But then again that’s probably because over here we actually know and somewhat understand the mentality of ‘the enemy’ compared to some thug on the street.)

In any case it’s already getting late by my schedule and I really should get some sleep. Just wanted to go ahead and at least post to let everybody know that I’m doing fine and if I don’t post for a day or two that there’s nothing to worry about. I’m just trying to push myself harder to become more than what I’ve been before. Good night, much love, and God speed.

Kind of hopeful he’d actually get a comment every once in a while and stuck in his own version of reality, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 24

Instead of trying to preach, today I decided to just talk a little more about myself. By our modern standards, as Americans, I’m still just a kid at the age of eighteen. To most of my elders I simply do not have the life experiences to have true wisdom or too great an understanding of the world around me; however, where most would claim wisdom comes with age I claim that with youth comes an optimistic outlook. Even the greatest of teachers can always learn something new from their pupils, and it is usually those that learn the most that make the better teachers: that means that they are actually paying attention to their students.

For most of my life I have seemed oddly strange to those outside of my circle of friends, because no matter where I’ve moved to or where I have lived there has always been some kind of circle that actually understood and accepted me. I’m sure that if I actually did go to some kind of psychiatrist and answered all their questions honestly that they would probably have a sheet or two of their notepad with possible, or definite, disorders for me. Compared to your stereotypical male of eighteen I simply do not meet the standard. Most ‘adults’ who know me either think me some sort of dreamer or “wise for age,” pending of course on if they actually sat down and discussed a serious issue with me or just watched how I act.

I am an eighteen year old male (according to the state). I am enlisted in the U.S. Army (and have been for almost a year now). I support gay rights (including marriage) [along with that I truly believe homosexuality, in some cases, is natural (will probably go in depth at a later time)]. I agree with equality of the sexes (so long as it’s actually equal for both sides). I completely disagree with racism (on ANY level and EVERY race). I believe in more principles then just christianity (many aspects of different religions can be conjoined). There is such a thing as the supernatural and paranormal abilities: ex. pchycic, witchcraft, angelic blessings (you WON’T change my mind so don’t try). Gender, sex, and sexuality are all three very distinct aspects of the human being (just as the body and soul are seperate). I do agree with the death penalty (go ahead, say it’s because I’m from Tx). If you’re going to do something do it to the best of your abilities (if not then why try). I truly believe that I have led this life for some ultimate purpose (else my actual death, and my many close experiences with death, would have been successful). Along with so many more things.

You can love or hate me, agree or disagree with me, tolerate or embrace me; however, in the end I am going to live my life in the best manner that I see fit and nothing that any individual of this world can do will change that. My heart, both greatest strength and weakness, will always be what I listen to first, my God second, friends and family third, mind fourth, state fifth, country sixth, and everyone else last. I know that my thoughts and opinions stray from normalcy but with our world in a state of chaos who wants to be normal. Instead you should look yourself in the mirror every day and tell yourself “Today I am going to do the best job I can do just being me, nothing more and nothing less.” So long as you do that you can live your life with no regrets.

Reminding you all to be safe and life life to its fullest, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 23

At some point in our lives we all become tired, each and every one will become weary in mind, body, or soul, if not all three. It is during these times that we are tested in our faith of a greater power then that of simple mortality. For as simple creatures we have simple thoughts and sometimes find it difficult to look beyond the veil into the power that lies beyond. Step back, breathe, and remember that you are alone. No matter how great or small you may be as a person you shall never be forgotten.

The bible not only tells us that we won’t be forgotten but also gives the promise that our Lord will be there to lift us up when we are weak and weary. According to: Isaiah 40:29-31 (Amplified Bible)
²⁹He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound].³⁰Even youths shall faint and be weary, and [selected] young men shall feebly stumble and fall exhausted; ³¹But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired.

As you can see with your own eyes the only condition for him to grant us strength is for us but to look for and expect him to give us help. Should we but reach out and take that hand to help us up it will be there; I, on a very personal level, have felt this strength time and time again, especially since I’ve joined the military. Times of seperation, sickness, or pain, these are all times to become weary with trying and there are so many more; however, give your faith in the Lord that all shall be well and you will “walk and not faint or become tired.”

Each time that I feel like giving up or feel abandoned (one reference that I’ve actually made about myself ‘feeling like a puppy dropped out the window of the truck, knowing that it was an accident and that they’d turn around to come pick you up… you just knew it…) I try and step back and remember all the things I have overcome with the power of prayer and patience. While running away from home I came across some new friends who pulled me into a new family, a local church where I met a girl that I spent over two years of my life with. One night after a long day of class in AZ, and a very emotional week, I met a girl who could manage to pull a smile and actually listened to my story.

For some reason I have always seemed to grow stronger when faced with adversity or pure exhaustion and I partially claim that to be in my Roberts’ blood; however, most of that is attributed to God. At any time that my heart has faltered or my strength has failed me he brought me back and put me in a place of light. It may not have been as quickly as I desired but it was always for the best.

Remember in your own day to day struggles that there is always someone there for you to talk to, and he will always grant you the strength needed to carry on. No matter how great the obstacle it can be overcome with the combined strength of yourself and your faith. Should place full faith in Him then your own wings shall be lifted to take you into flight and marvelous things can happen.

Always working towards and hoping for a better tommorow then today, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 22

In the past I have spoken about a plan for each of us, regardless of if you believe in a divine power, and have said time and time again that we each have a purpose. Today’s focus is on that purpose according to the words given us by the words passed down from one generation to the next.

1 Corinthians 12:27-31(New Living Translation)
²⁷ All of you together are Christ’s body, and each of you is a part of it. ²⁸ Here are some of the parts God has appointed for the church: first are apostles, second are prophets, third are teachers, then those who do miracles, those who have the gift of healing, those who can help others, those who have the gift of leadership, those who speak in unknown languages. ²⁹ Are we all apostles? Are we all prophets? Are we all teachers? Do we all have the power to do miracles? ³⁰ Do we all have the gift of healing? Do we all have the ability to speak in unknown languages? Do we all have the ability to interpret unknown languages? Of course not! ³¹ So you should earnestly desire the most helpful gifts. But now let me show you a way of life that is best of all.

 The point of these verses, in my humble and honest opinion, is that though each of us is different we all contribute to the same goal. To a christian that would be His will. From the experiences in my own life I have been given the gift to be a living miracle, by walking from death unscathed, and to perform miracles by bringing a smile to those around me. To some that may not seem like much; however, over the course of my eighteen years one of the many lessons learned is to find an appreciation in the simple things. If we should find ourselves enthusiastic about something as small as a butterfly then I ask you to imagine the joy from something truly awe-inspiring and great to the masses.

Look yourself in the mirror, go ahead, and try to find something in your life to be enthusiastic about. Search behind the visible surface for the talents given you; that isn’t to say that you should accept any inherent weakness, on the contrary, should you offer yourself up for His plan then these seemingly would-be flaws may be washed away and replaced with an entirely new strength. Take for instance someone weak in communication: should that person pray to become a vessel of light that is our Lord he may take said weakness and make her into a messanger of the word.

Following in accordance with the old saying: the one may be weak but the many we are strong, take it upon yourself to discover what your place is in the hierarchy that is, and I do hesitate to use this word, destiny. As the book says we can’t all be apostles or prophets, teaching and healing aren’t made for all either; however, each of us does have a place and serve a purpose. Be not content with a life of mediocracy when you can aim to excel. Take your strengths, build upon them, and overcome what weaknesses you have been given. No matter how great or strong you think you are there is always someone else that thinks of you as their whole world. Brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, I ask you all to take each other by the hand and walk with me, work with me, towards a brighter future for us as a human race.

Hopeful for a better tomorrow where we can all work together, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 21

As a soldier I’m faced with day-to-day actions that could place those around me in harms way, friend and foe alike. All too often it becomes easy for us to lose ourselves in the adrenal rush of the moment and make a decision that shouldn’t have been made; I’m sure you’ve heard of at least one occasion in the news, a time when a soldier pulled the trigger too early or realized what he’d already done too late. It is in these times that we should take a second, however brief, to step back and pray on our next course of action. Personally, in any competition that I’ve been in there has always been that feeling that it is wrong to pray for your own victory. It isn’t the Lords way, that is the mortal way. Instead we should look up above our own lives and pray that His will be served above our own. That brings me to today’s verse.

Psalm 7:3-5 (Amplified Bible)
³Lord my God, if I have done this, if there is wrong in my hands, ⁴If I have paid back with evil him who was at peace with me or without cause have robbed him who was my enemy, ⁵Let the enemy pursue my life and take it; yes, let him trample my life to the ground and lay my honor in the dust. Selah!

My life isn’t something great or to be marveled at unless God himself wills it to be so; and as such, if any of my own actions seem great it is because of the strength he has placed in me. He has a plan for each of us regardless of if you believe in it, the better question is ‘how can I help His plan come to fruitation?’ Sometimes we will stray from that path for our own benefits or reasons. Most of us at one point or another have done another wrongly for selfish gain. It is because of this instinct, this bit that is humanity,  that I pray not for victory over mine enemies but instead for justice.

If I have truly done those that would stand against me wrongly then I ask the Lord to show me that weakness and offer me up to them. If my life has been lead to a point of chaos and destruction, a life of sin and selfishness, then I am no longer serving his purpose and ought to be made an example of before the world to show the power that is His. Be it my life that is taken or some other punishment that would seem more fitting I believe in a just God that would treat all of his children fairly and not show his support for one undeserving.

Try and take a moment each day to look back and think about if you have done wrong towards someone, be they friend or foe. If you find that the answer is yes then do what steps you can to correct that misdeed before you lay down your head that night. It may even be something as simple as sending an e-mail or a phone call to say that you’re sorry. If you must wage war, as our country is now, then wage war in an honest manner and treat your enemy with the dignity that a christian should treat any other person. In the end all of us shall be held accountable for our actions by both judge and jury; on this most religions agree. So though my words come from the teachings of christianity they are important lessons for us all.

Reminding us all to do as we believe is right, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 19

The eyes are the looking glass
to see inside the soul.
It’s a hidden piece of my past,
a whole other story untold.

Since my birth I had this gift
though it sometimes seems a curse.
It takes me to within a rift,
sometimes seems it could get me hurt.

With this power I’ve seen into your eyes.
Even if little more then just a small part;
The wear of using so much of the sight,
gave you complete control of the heart.

In return I haven’t asked for much,
with my love I’ve paid the cost.
Forever I will be your pup,
because without you I’d truly be lost.

Just some thoughts that I put down into words; as busy as the Army keeps me here most of me is just ready to go back to those that I love and care about more then anything else in this world. I don’t claim to be a poet or someone that has changed the world, but so long as I’m capable of breathing I’ll do everything within my power to keep those close safe from harm. I know where I belong, all that’s left is to be patient enough for the time to come where I can take my place and cause a change one day at a time. So long as I keep my faith strong it will be all too soon when I’m by your side.

posted by tommie on May 19

Continuing on the theme of love I have another set of verses that deal with this issue. To me it always has been the most important aspect of humanity that one should be able to love, not only himself but also those around him. For if one is truly not capable of compassion then what place is there on this earth? Our sole purpose, as a part of the christian community, is to spread the love and joy that becoming one with the Lord can bring to those around us. If keep nothing but hatred within our hearts then I ask how can this be done, you should always remember:

1 John 3:10-11 (King James Version)
¹⁰In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother. ¹¹For this is the message that ye heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.

Regardless of your personal faith it’s too easy to ‘look to your left and right’, as they so often tell you to do in the military, and see how each individual can impact the community as a whole. If you let hatred overwhelm you then happiness becomes unattainable, and who in this world would truly desire to lead an unhappy existance? This is my primary goal in life: to love those around me with a caring and forgiving heart, bring peace to those that bear a burden, forgive those that would do me harm, wipe away the tears of sadness, and bring a joyful smile to those in need. I can’t honestly say that I love every person that walks the earth in an equal share; however, what I can say is that if asked I would do my best to help someone in need.

In age I am little more then 18 years; however, I have faced the hands of death and returned to the realm of life. Partially due to that experience my outlook is generally to look for light within the darkness, because once you examine a person and discover the truth then you can bring it out to the world and from truth we can bring light. No matter how dark or desperate a person may seem there is always a reason, there is always that feeling, always that very same beat of the heart. All too often I have heard close friends say that they ‘give up’ on trying to feel love, or emotion in any sense, and I can’t agree with that. Had you honestly given up, as is the case with every individual I’ve dealt with concerning said issue, you would no longer be able to show an honest smile or shed tears of love and sadness.

It is because of love that we can’t find it within ourselves to give up, and I don’t think we should give up on each other. So ‘look to your left and right,’ find someone that you personally care about and challenge them as I challenge you now: take each day as a chance to reach out and let someone you know feel the warmth of love. If we all took that attitude each day there’s no telling how far we could come as a race, as humanity, as the ‘children of God.’

With much love and all the faith a soldier can muster, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)

posted by tommie on May 19

If you’re like me then chances are that some of the things going on in America have probably been bothering you. Specifically, many of the actions taken to remove religion from any relation to our society. To me it undermines one of our founding focus’: to freely express your own religion. Should that group of people support a particular religion, especially if it has historical value, then there should be no problems with showing that publicly. I find this particularly disturbing on levels such as highschools and the removal of historical pieces from ‘governmental agencies’ such as local court houses.

For those of you that honestly believe the church and state should be entirely seperated here’s an interesting fact for you. In my possession I have: 1″Knights of Christ,” 2″Daily Guideposts 2008,” 3″Experiencing GOD Day by Day,” 4″You Can Have God’s Help With Daily Problems,” 5′Amplified’ Bible, 6′Good News’ Bible, 7′King James’ New Testament, and the 8′Holomon Christian Standard’ Soldier Edition Bible. Out of all of these I’ve only paid for one, the Soldiers Bible (also the only one I brought with me to Iraq), and I have NOT visited a chaplain (military priest) since my deployment. You should take that as a sign that there is some connection between religion and our military at the least.

However, that’s not the most important thing about this post. More on point is this: Matthew 22:37-40 (Holomon Christian Standard Bible Soldier Edition)
³⁷He Said to him, “Love the Lord your God with  all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. ³⁸This is the greatest and most important commandment. ³⁹The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. ⁴⁰All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commandments.”

For those of you out there that consider yourselves christian remember these commandments to be the most important according to Jesus Christ, to those of you not christian you can still take these as guide-lines to the way to live your lives. Agreements on everything is not important, what you should remember is that we all live, work, and play in the very same world and as such should find enough love, if not enough respect, to treat each other with dignity and respect.

You don’t have to like someone in order to show them the fruits of love: just accept them as they are and if you disagree meditate on it with yourself or your own diety whatever your personal choice is. Love, not force, is the only way to show those around you the purity of your faith. We would all do well to remember that, especially now in this time of war; agree or not on why we’re here you should show love and compassions towards the people fighting every day for their own beliefs and personal struggles…

With much love and all the faith a soldier can muster, Tommie Roberts (a.k.a. Pup)